Quotes
by water lily in clearwater
Summary: What if some wizards and witches found A Very Potter Musical, A Very Potter Sequel and/or A Very Potter Senior Year on the internet, but didn't mention it to any grown-up? Watch what happens!
1. What the devil is going on here?

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything  
AN: I just wanted to try this out... Enjoy :)

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'Shit! We're late! For potions for god's sake!' Ron panted furiously, while he and Harry were sprinting down the stairs to the dungeon.

Just outside the door, Harry said: 'We're already late, we'd better go in, in _style_. Do you have any ideas?'  
The grin that appeared on Ron's face showed the answer.  
'So, here's what we're going to do...'

Snape looked at the empty seats of Potter and Weasley. They'd probably come bursting in any minute now, coming up with dumb excuses.  
It was good for Potter to have some more detention, that arrogant little brat. He was his father all over again.

To think of the devil... but it was not entirely what he had expected. Potter and Weasley threw open the door dramatically, wearing _his_ robes, saying: 'What the devil is going on here?!'

Snape was dumbfounded, and just stared at them, opening and closing his mouth like a goldfish, while half the class were laughing their heads off, and the other half looked at them incredulously. It was obvious who had seen A Very Potter Musical/Sequel, and who hadn't.

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AN: So, this was actually a one-shot, but if you want one about another quote, feel free to leave a review or PM me. Also for anything else :p It isn't a one-shot anymore! :)


	2. SIRIUS BLACK!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, unfortunately  
AN: So, this was supposed to be a one-shot, but you guys seemed to like it, so here's an update :) Also, this is set in third year, you might wanna know :p

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'I'm bored,' Ron complained.  
'You could finish your Potions essay,' Hermione suggested.  
'Are you mad? I'm still have another week for that! But you gave me a better idea,' he said, smirking, and he stood up and walked away.  
'Why do I have the feeling that I'm not going to like that _idea_?' Hermione asked Harry, who just shrugged, said: 'I'll go see what he's up to,' and followed him out of the portrait hole.

He caught up with Ron and asked: 'What are you going to do?'  
'You'll see.'

Harry was surprised when he noticed they were going to the staff room. He was really getting curious now, but knew better than to ask. Just before they reached it, he started running, and panting, as if he had been running the whole journey, burst in and screamed:

'SIRIUS BLACK! SIRIUS BLAA- ' at this point he reached McGonagall, who was playing chess with Dumbledore, and put Dumbledore checkmate, 'ooh, checkmate!' and continued like nothing happened:  
'SIRIUS BLAAAAACK!' The teachers were thunderstruck , until Professor Sprout asked: 'What about him?'  
'He was spotted by the paintings on the third floor. The dogs playing poker peed on the carpet. The screaming man has never looked more terrified. It took the entire last supper to calm him down. Sirius Black, has broken into our castle!' Ron started screaming again, and he ran back to where Harry stood, and jumped into his arms. Harry didn't see this coming, however, and he and Ron both fell to the floor, trying not to laugh. When they got up, they saw the teachers' reactions. Dumbledore missed the twinkle in his eyes, McGonagall looked rather shocked, Lupins face had a greenish tinge to it, and he looked positively sick, Professor Snape wore a look of loathing, Professor Sprout was whispering: 'Oh dear, oh dear,' Professor Trelawney was mumbling something about that she had seen it coming, and the other professors and Filch had similar reactions.

Then, Dumbledore looked at Ron intently, who was not so good at hiding his laughing, and he asked: 'Are you serious?' and Ron couldn't help it but say: 'No, I'm Severus.' Then he burst into fits of laughter and tried to pull Harry away and run, but laughing and running isn't a good combination, as some of you who might know.

That night, when they shared their detention, Ron was still smirking. He would occasionally say things like: 'We don't even have a portrait of dogs playing poker,' and 'The way they looked at Snape in the end,' and even though Harry did need his sleep, he wouldn't have wanted to miss that.

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AN: I hope you like this chapter too, please leave a review!


	3. Super-mega-foxy-awesome-hot

**Disclaimer: **I still don't own (yet!), everything belongs to JK, Starkid, and loads of other people I don't feel like looking up and typing here. This idea, however is my own.  
AN: Sorry it took so long to update, if you wanna know why, read the AN in my other story.  
And yep, I have a picture now, and it was kinda so you wouldn't desert me and to let you know I'm still alive. So, today we have a story with two quotes, and I'm trying to make it one real story instead of small stories. So, enjoy :) And thank you so much for all the reviews Grandmaster of the Swordsworn and susan sebest, Lady Lianna Kari and Minotaur-of-crete for chapter 1 (I'm so sorry I forgot to thank you guys for reviewing, I love reviews ;)

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'It was really not funny to do that, do you know what could have happened? Those people really knew Sirius Black, and probably _liked_ him, and they had no idea he would turn out to be a murderer. They didn't need to be reminded of that. And I really think you should stop those pranks.' Hermione was so nice to help them find the way back to Gryffindor tower from the Trophy Room. Like they would get lost without her. Ron snorted at the thought.

'What's so funny? I really don't think it's funny, don't you remember what Dumbledore said?'

'Actually, I do. It was "Severus Snape is the kindest, bravest, gentlest, sexiest man I've ever met".

Of course, every time you're talking about Snape, he has a knack for showing up. This time was no exception.

'Do you think me 'sexy', Weasley,' he said silkily, like always. Did he practise for that, or did he just eat silk? Probably both, Ron mused.

'No,' he heard Harry say, but the mischievous tone to his voice promised more, 'more like super-mega-foxy-awesome-hot.' Harry nearly burst into laughing during the sentence, and failed to contain it at the end. If he didn't have the humour in his voice it would have been very scary.

Ron laughed and tried to run (which is still not a good combination), Harry couldn't even stand up straight because he was bent over laughing, and Hermione's face was contorted into a mixture of disapproval and amusement.

'Detention!' And Snape was gone again.

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AN: If you liked this, or didn't, or have a good idea for a quote, hit the little blue button at the bottom ;)


	4. Even potties need to eat!

**Disclaimer: **I'm not blond, do I have to do this every time?  
AN: Surprise, I'm not dead! I'm sorry I've been gone for so long, time just slips through my fingers. This chapter is dedicated to Emmeebee, who came with this quote.

Harry hurried to his next class. He must be at least ten minutes late, because Wood wouldn't stop talking about their Quidditch tactics. Thank God he had Defence against the Dark arts, and not Potions. Nobody should ever be late in Snape's class, and Harry knew it. It didn't make it a lot better if you stole his clothes as well. But, he had Lupin.

Or so he thought. When he opened the door to the classroom, it was completely dark, and there was no Lupin, just a Snape. No surprise it was dark, that light probably hurt that bat's eyes.

'You're late, Potter. Detention on Saturday.'

'But sir, I have Quidditch-'  
'You'd better not interrupt my lesson again, Potter.'

Harry snapped his mouth shut. Guess he thanked God a little too soon, then.

Of course, Snape had started on the very last chapter, so nobody would know the answer to any of his questions, and he could complain to the other teachers how bad Lupin taught. Dick move.

Harry tried his hardest not to fall asleep as Snape drawled about how vicious and vile werewolves were, when suddenly a paper appeared in front of his drooping eyes. Apparently, Draco had made a drawing about how he predicted the upcoming Quidditch match would go. Little brat.

'Psst, Draco,' Harry whispered.  
Draco turned around, and Harry handed him a piece of paper.  
'I've made a drawing of you too. See, it's you, on the potty! And that's your father, in the background, saying: that's my son! He's finally proud of you now you've learnt how to use the potty! And the potty says: 'Thank you Draco, even potties need to eat!''  
Some girls started laughing when they heard Harry's half-whisper. Draco looked at Harry like he'd gone mad. Which he probably had, because Snape was already pissed off, this only made it worse.

'Potter!'


End file.
